You may not believe this...

When I was a little girl, I joined a lot of stuff because many of my friends from school joined.  Yes, I was a loser, I know... Did I really want to be a cheerleader? no... especially since my mom had to sew the outfit - hideous... and who wants to be the biggest cheerleader on the "squad", yeah no.... I played basketball - that was a lot of fun, except we sucked.... and I looked like a (I was going to use a deragatory term for a girl who likes other girls... but I forgot that my "boss" reads this - sorry about that...) I looked like an ugly, manish version of Dorothy Hamill.  

the socks? 

My dad even signed me up for stuff, let us not forget the swim team - green speedo, second to last place ribbon.... thanks dad - I still need therapy for that, how about the violin lessons - once again dad - thanks... but what this post is about is the mistreatment of me by my beloved father... he signed me up for .... wait for it.... ballet.  Yeah that's right - pink tights, black leotard, ballet shoes... HIDEOUS... Here's the deal though... my step-sister took ballet - clearly where Selden got the bright idea... but Anna was long, lean, athletic, lean, thin, skinny, not fat, not plump, and did not look like a manish version of Dorothy Hamill.  

No wonder I need therapy... look at the daisies on my leotard....

Sometimes my mom would drop me off at the "dance" studio and I would act like I would walk up the stairs - wait til my mom drove off and then I would sit on the stairs and wait til the lesson was over... horrible it was so horrible.  I can remember wanting to be long and lean so bad and some times I would look out the window and convince my self that I wasn't so bad - I could do this! (especially if I got the special square bag that all the "real" ballerinas carried their stuff in  - my sister knows what I'm talking about) and then the teacher comes up and says uh excuse me... are you planning on taking the dance test (some test that dancers have to take to move up to the next "level", you get a special certificate with your name on it -  in gold lettering, classy... I wanted it but never got it.....)? so I say uhhhh..... and she says before I can decide my destiny.... yeah you probably don't need to..... ouch!   Well there goes that dream... no olympic gold medal in gymnastics, no first chair in violin, and no prima ballerina status....  when will the mediocrity end?